May 23, 2013

Optional Post IV - Facebook Fan?

This one has been percolating for a bit. As with all optional posts, there's no mention of Owen or Cearra, no fun pictures, so if you choose to skip it, no offense taken. Sometimes I just have to quiet the drip by getting the words down on paper.

I like Facebook. Most mornings when I come home from the school run I settle in front of the computer with breakfast and spend a few minutes happily logged on.

As most of my friends are scattered across the country, I find Facebook a nice way to keep up with their lives. I truly enjoy seeing the photos of babies, proms, grads in shiny gowns, puppies, and new homes. I get a little lift in wishing folks I may not see all year a Happy Birthday and I appreciate when its reciprocated. The inspiring videos and shared stories warm my heart and some of those vintage looking postcards are pretty darn funny.

I've gone to Facebook pleading for prayers, asking for support, requesting donations to help others, and each time my posts have been met abundantly by my friends. Facebook let me earn some pocket change by selling items via virtual yard sales and through my (now idle) page, Sweet Repeats. It's put me back in touch with sorority sisters and helped me connect with a group of fellow Kaz adoptive families. Good stuff.

So yes, I like Facebook. And yet ...

Lately it seems to me that Facebook (and it's cousins Twitter and InstaGram) are contributing to creating a society where we don't talk to each other; we talk at each other. We over share while we isolate. We hide inside or face plant on our iPhones, intent on not missing the latest update from our "friends". Sometimes people post so often I wonder how they have time to  live IRL; time to play with their children or take a walk or perform their job. Often I think it's sad - the cryptic or angry or whining posts; do the people typing actually feel better for baring their souls on a stark white screen rather than sitting with a pal over a cup of coffee and talking? Are they really that alone?

Then there's the side of Facebook that rises in me an unexpected anger. The spouses who rant and rave and demean the very person they promised to love and honor. The folks who seem to boast "look at me, I'm a good Christian!" by posting Bible verses, yet lie and cheat and steal and hurt those closest to them. Or the parents who tag their children in pretty little prepackaged inspirational quotes but don't pick up the phone to actually ask their kids how they are. In those cases, I think Facebook has become a substitute for real relationships.

And I find that very sad.

2 comments:

Maria said...


It is so true that Facebook like anything can be used for good or bad. I've been forced to unfriend a few acquaintances for bad mouthing their spouse or loved one. I've also seen people loose all judgment and discretion online. It can be dangerous and I think we all need to exercise moderation. The people I'm most concerned about are the kids who I think are missing out on real relationships and may not learn how to form them.

NANA said...

Jodi, I think we have discussed this subject, and you know I couldn't agree with you more. I check Facebook every once in a while for pictures of my kids, for little tidbits about friends I don't see often, but for me, Facebook can't and never will replace genuine conversation. Love MOM