Today was Little League Day at Camden Yards. Before the Oriole's game thousands of players from all over Maryland and Virginia make a lap around the warning track, high-fiving players, and waving to the crowd. I'd been talking to Owen about it for the last few days, letting him know that Daddy and Mommy weren't allowed to be on the field with him, and in fact he wouldn't be able to see us for most of the parade. He said he wanted to do it (although his little brow would crease as he asked me several times if we could go with him).
This morning we arrived at our designated "green balloon spot" at the side of the stadium. Owen happily joined in with his fellow White Sox. I mentioned to his coach that I wasn't sure how this would play out once Bob and I were no longer in sight. I straightened Owen's hat and told him again that his coaches and teammates would be with him on the field and then would bring him to us in the stands. I hugged him and told him I loved him.
Too soon it was time to leave. Bob and I walked to the stadium gates as my eyes welled with tears. I was nervous for my baby. There was no way I'd be able to get to him once we were inside; I couldn't reach him once the parade started. An image of his panicked face floated in my mind. I said a prayer that he'd be OK; that he'd feel safe and have fun. I literally wrung my hands and fretted.
Bob and I hurried to a spot in the stands and waited for the Westminster Little League teams to emerge from the tunnel. Other youngsters came by, waving and laughing. We waited more. I smiled for the camera, but inside I'm only thinking of Owen.
Finally - the green balloons! There are the White Sox - and there's #3!
As best as I can tell from yards away he looks calm. Just kind of taking it all in. Going by the dugout now - slapping hands with some players. I can't see his face but I know he's OK, and I'm smiling like crazy! His team walks by the outfield wall and one of the bigger boys from a team behind them picks Owen up so he can high five someone in the stands (O will later tell me he didn't particularly like that part!). Round the bend and here they come!
I yell "Go White Sox" as Bob yells for Owen and we are rewarded by waves and smiles from his teammates; and from Owen, a look that says he is just fine, as if he did this every day of his life.
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| You can only see the top of his head, right in front of the coach in orange |
Then they are heading off, Owen moving to the edge of the track to trail his fingers along the fence before hustling to catch up to his team. For the first time in almost 2 hours I exhale. My eyes well up and I know my baby is doing well. That's he's happy. That he knows he is safe and loved.
Coach Sean brings him to our seats and I give him a huge hug, saying I am so very proud of him. We eat sausages, and hot dogs, and cinnamon and sugar pretzels as we cheer on the home team. Bob and Owen get new matching hats and we all relax and enjoy a gorgeous day together.
Oh yes ... my heart is as buoyant as those green balloons set free and floating off into a crystal clear blue sky.
If you don't know Owen well; if you haven't read this (or if you don't know about attachment and separation issues that can arise with adoption); I realize I may sound crazy right about now. But this day was huge for us, and I wanted to share it with you all. Please be kind to this admittedly very protective mother!
