Big Win!

I am bursting-at-the-heart-seams proud of this kid!!

Today was Little League Day at Camden Yards. Before the Oriole's game thousands of players from all over Maryland and Virginia make a lap around the warning track, high-fiving players, and waving to the crowd. I'd been talking to Owen about it for the last few days, letting him know that Daddy and Mommy weren't allowed to be on the field with him, and in fact he wouldn't be able to see us for most of the parade. He said he wanted to do it (although his little brow would crease as he asked me several times if we could go with him).

This morning we arrived at our designated "green balloon spot" at the side of the stadium. Owen happily joined in with his fellow White Sox. I mentioned to his coach that I wasn't sure how this would play out once Bob and I were no longer in sight. I straightened Owen's hat and told him again that his coaches and teammates would be with him on the field and then would bring him to us in the stands. I hugged him and told him I loved him.

Too soon it was time to leave. Bob and I walked to the stadium gates as my eyes welled with tears. I was nervous for my baby. There was no way I'd be able to get to him once we were inside; I couldn't reach him once the parade started. An image of his panicked face floated in my mind. I said a prayer that he'd be OK; that he'd feel safe and have fun. I literally wrung my hands and fretted.

Bob and I hurried to a spot in the stands and waited for the Westminster Little League teams to emerge from the tunnel. Other youngsters came by, waving and laughing. We waited more. I smiled for the camera, but inside I'm only thinking of Owen.

Finally - the green balloons! There are the White Sox - and there's #3!

As best as I can tell from yards away he looks calm. Just kind of taking it all in. Going by the dugout now - slapping hands with some players. I can't see his face but I know he's OK, and I'm smiling like crazy! His team walks by the outfield wall and one of the bigger boys from a team behind them picks Owen up so he can high five someone in the stands (O will later tell me he didn't particularly like that part!). Round the bend and here they come!

I yell "Go White Sox" as Bob yells for Owen and we are rewarded by waves and smiles from his teammates; and from Owen, a look that says he is just fine, as if he did this every day of his life.

You can only see the top of his head,
right in front of the coach in orange

Then they are heading off, Owen moving to the edge of the track to trail his fingers along the fence before hustling to catch up to his team. For the first time in almost 2 hours I exhale. My eyes well up and I know my baby is doing well. That's he's happy. That he knows he is safe and loved.

Coach Sean brings him to our seats and I give him a huge hug, saying I am so very proud of him. We eat sausages, and hot dogs, and cinnamon and sugar pretzels as we cheer on the home team. Bob and Owen get new matching hats and we all relax and enjoy a gorgeous day together.

Oh yes ... my heart is as buoyant as those green balloons set free and floating off into a crystal clear blue sky.

If you don't know Owen well; if you haven't read this (or if you don't know about attachment and separation issues that can arise with adoption); I realize I may sound crazy right about now. But this day was huge for us, and I wanted to share it with you all. Please be kind to this admittedly very protective mother!

Great Season Rockies!

"Are They Cheering For Me?"

Little League Day at Camden Yards ... posing with the big 5 in honor of his upcoming birthday (and Brooks Robinson) ... eating hot dogs and popcorn ... cheering on the home team and wondering if the "Let's Go O's!" chants were for him.




Alas, shakers and rally caps didn't help the Orioles as they lost to the birds from Canada.


Fun day anyway!

Play Ball!

Finally ... Owen's first t-ball game!

We got up early (some of us more enthusiastically than others) to be in time for his 9:00am game against the Phillies at Westminster's City Park.

Decked out in his Rockies purple jersey and hat, Owen had a good game. Hit the ball well in all three at-bats, ran to the right bases in the correct order, and somewhat paid attention in the field. Most importantly, he had fun ... and got cookies, apple slices and a juice box as an after-game snack (ask Cearra: the snack is really what determines the winner).


In the "dugout" with his team.


Next up to bat.


Slugger!


Coming home to a high-five from Coach Scott.


Looking somewhat ready in right field.


So cute!

Tube Sock Troubles

This is what happens when you have a smallish 4-year old wearing a biggish t-ball uniform, and a newbie baseball Mom who has no clue what to do with the socks:


I know it's not a great picture, but trust me, his purple tube socks were well over his knees and bumpy in strange places. After much tucking and fussing, I managed to get this:


Of course, once we got to picture night and Owen saw that all of his teammates wore their pants over their socks, it all became for naught. But at least he's excited to be #3 on the Westminster Optimist Little League Rockies!

Where My Heart Lives

Tuesday night at our first ever t-ball academy. Owen easily joins the cluster of players listening to a coach, and when directed, runs with the pack to the far side of the field for warm-ups. I watch his little red-jacketed form do stretches, then chug along as they all run a lap (and smile as he cuts the loop short in order to keep up with the bigger kids).

Back to the corner across the way from me, and I can no longer see him as the group once more crowds around to listen for their next activity. I hear another parent saying they will need their glove now, so I start across the field to take his to Owen.

He's not in the small group breaking off in a trot to the left, not among the ten or so boys streaming by me on their way to a practice station flag. And then I see him, a few yards away, crying in the arms of another mother. I quicken my step and hear her ask him what color his mommy is wearing; as I come into their line of sight Owen leans towards me as I reach out for him.

He nestles his wet cheeks into my neck as I rub his back and ask what happened. A few deep breaths and moments later, he manages to whisper "I couldn't see you ... I thought you left me!".

Oh, my sweet baby. My heart twists as I imagine his growing panic when he looked around and saw only faces he didn't yet know. I can picture the look in his eyes as the fear crept in. I hug him tight and promise I'll never leave him (please God, allow me to keep that promise for a long, long time). I wipe his face and talk softly to him until he feels safe again.

We go to the first station together. I gently encourage him to join the group of six boys and follow the coach in a throwing exercise. Owen participates timidly, looking over his shoulder for me often as I stand a few feet behind. He and I make our way through a few more stations this way, until once again he is smiling and laughing with the boy next to him, running to the next flag with the rest of his group when the whistle blows.

The night ends well. He is happy, if a little tired and cold, and I think his comfort and confidence will grow in the next academy. But days later, the memory of his tears still pains me. And I know that next time I'll be sure to stay in his sight from the start.

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Yesterday morning we walk into school and his two buddies, Brice and Ben, come running up immediately to engage him in their favorite game of "My favorite color is ...". Owen joins right in, laughing at what they all find hysterical.

I help him hang up his jacket and backpack, and kneel down for our routine hug-kiss-"I love you" before leaving. But for the first time, he's already started to turn away, a grin on his face, big eyes sparkling in obvious anticipation of more fun with his friends.

"Owen, where's my hug?"

He comes back right away and gives me quick kisses, then runs off to join Brice and Ben. I know he's happy and it's wonderful to see him so engaged and making friends. I love hearing his laugh as I leave ... although there's a small tugging feeling in my chest. Because as much as it's good and right, it still sometimes feels like he's growing up too fast.

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Two days, two stories. Further evidence that my heart no longer lives inside my body.

What I'm Loving Wednesday

Welcome back to What I'm Loving Wednesday. Feel free to play along by leaving a comment! OK, let's go ...

I'm really loving that we've already raised $440 for the people of Japan! I'm going to make and sell the flower pins until the end of June, at which time I'll send all the monies to a charity that is still doing good work there.


I'm loving working on creating a new look for the blog and your nice comments. And yes, I'm writing up the bee story!


I'm loving Mary Kay Ultimate Mascara! My all-time favorite mascara is Dior DiorShow, but since my budget does not generally include almost $25 for make-up, I find the MK version a very nice alternative.

If you are interested in trying Mary Kay make-up or skin care, my Aunt Cathy would be happy to help you - and I promise she won't bug you about hosting a party or becoming a consultant (unless of course you want to!). Visit her site here.


I'm loving that after 2 years, "Baby" no longer bolts off the deck the minute I open the slider, and that last week she actually ate a little while I sat outside. One of these days I will pet her!


I'm loving Owen's cute new cleats (in the smallest size they make) and watching all his fellow t-ball players at their first "academy" last night. So sweet and funny!


I'm loving watching our lilies "spring" to life after a long, cold winter!


And as always I'm loving every second with our little man - even if it means playing combine demolition derby for the 100th time!

That's it for this week; have a great day!

Put Me In Coach!

I'm ready to play!

Official T-ball academy starts next week; today was just us in the yard tossing/batting the ball around and having fun.


Coach Daddy


Love the effort behind the throw


Must keep eye on ball ...


got it!


Whack - right back at me!