What Love Can Do

As a follow up to my one-year anniversary post, I thought you might all enjoy seeing our fellow travelers the Sullivan family (top pics), and two of Owen's hamster buddies, back then (meeting their parents for the first time) and now.

When I look at these pictures I see so much joy and happiness in the smiles of our friends Bill, Jill, Sean, Maureen, Darryl, and Jenny; and I see so much love reflected in the faces of their children Ryan, Lauren, James, and Garrett.

If you ever wondered what love could do, here's an answer.

One Year Ago Today

One year ago today, we woke in the pre-dawn hours in a hotel room halfway around the world, excitedly showered and dressed, plugged in our hair dryer ... and shorted the power in half of the rooms' outlets (and killed the dryer).

One year ago today, we met up with Rada, climbed into Vladimir's Toyota, drove to the Ministry of Education building ... and waited anxiously in a hallway with our fellow parents-to-be while Oleg took care of more (mysterious) paperwork.

One year ago today, we finally climbed the stairs at the Kokshetau Children's Hospital, entered a small, white tiled room and hurried to the crib to find ... the "wrong" baby looking up at us.

One year ago today, the caregivers quickly realized the mistake and hustled the waiting baby to his waiting parents, and brought us, finally, thankfully ... Owen.

One year ago today, we laughed and cried and celebrated as we held our son. One year ago today still seems like just yesterday to me. For the rest of my life I will remember the sights, sounds, smells and smiles of that day.

Yes, one year ago today our life changed forever. And every day since has been a good day.

Congratulations and happy anniversary to our fellow Kokshetau "hamster" parents and their children - Sean, Maureen and James Powers; and Darryl, Jenny and Garrett Kurtz (you too Bill, Jill, Lauren and Ryan!).

Many Thanks Nanny!

A new Owen-sized chair from Nanny is super comfy, but the box (turned into Owen's Club House - No Girls Allowed Except for Mommy) is super fun!

It's Love

Another adoptive family currently in the process reported that the director of the baby house in their city told them the number of babies placed for adoption has decreased recently. She was very pleased about this as it might mean that economic conditions/life is improving in Kazakhstan, allowing birth mothers (and fathers) to be able to raise their children rather than place them for adoption. Of course for families like ours this is a mixed blessing, but it is a good thing for the children and the country.

It also makes me ponder (not for the first time) how Owen will feel about being adopted. I realize that it's likely he will at times feel a loss over not knowing his birth mother or any blood relatives. We expect that one day he will look at us and his extended family and have conflicted emotions about not looking like any of us; not sharing the same cultural background. And I wonder if he will ever resent us for taking him from his birth country. It can sometimes be scary to think of these things, but they are issues all adoptive families face, and we'll do our best to navigate them (fortified by the knowledge we've gained from books, our social worker, and fellow families) as they occur.

But, for right now, life with Owen is very, very sweet. And oh, those moments ... when he smiles mischievously and "tackles" his daddy; when he comes to me for hugs and kisses if he's fallen; when he runs to the door at night when I say "Daddy's home!"; when he gives us kisses and giggles and reaches for us; when he lays his head on my shoulder and snuggles in. In these moments I know without a doubt - and without complication or question - he loves us. We are his comfort, his safe place, his play time and his happiness. I hope we always are.

The pictures today are from our visit with Nana and Pop-pop and Great-Nana P.

A Cutie in the Curtains

Thanks for your comments, emails and phone calls! I've set up Owen's hearing test for the end of this month and called the Infant and Toddler Program (in true government office fashion I got voice mail and no return call yet). So we'll just take it one day at a time from here and try not to get too crazy with worry!

One of Owen's favorite new games is playing peek-a-boo with the kitchen curtains; I know the pics look similar but they were all so cute I couldn't choose just one!

Labeling My Kid

At yesterday's doctor appointment my worries met up with the American Pediatric Association's guidelines for "normal" development, and the result leaves me a little sad, and yes, a little more worried.

Owen, despite his love of books and cheerful babbling, does not yet say the standard number of words for a child his age. I've recognized this for some time and have been working with him (flashcards, word games, etc.) to try to increase his vocabulary. Previously, our pediatrician wasn't alarmed (and in fairness he still isn't; his own son didn't talk until age 3) but hitting the 18-month milestone means further action. So Owen is now scheduled for a hearing test which will be followed by an assessment, and further speech therapy if warranted, by Maryland's Infant and Toddler Development program.

I think Owen will be just fine, but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a little nervous about what may be going on. But I also believe Owen will talk when he's ready. It wouldn't surprise me at all if he is one of those kids who welcomes his 2nd birthday with full sentences. He is obviously curious, observant and bright.

Perhaps in our competitive world we push children to reach certain milestones with little regard to the child him/herself. In Owen's case, he lived in an orphanage setting for over six months (which experts agree equates to a two month delay in development), and the only language he heard (and then most likely very rarely) was Russian. He certainly didn't have anyone reading to him or working with him on English sounds or words. Even without this beginning, perhaps he is just one of those kids who isn't verbal early in life, and maybe that should be OK. After all, Einstein didn't speak until he was four.

Still, we want to rule out any physical cause for his lack of formal speech, and of course provide him any assistance he may need, so we will pursue the path recommended. It just saddens me that he is now labeled "speech delayed" and the resulting suggestion that something is deficient in him. If we really must label kids, why not "unique"? Because that's what Owen is to me - exploring the world in his own way, learning things at his own pace, and doing things in his own style.

Fixin' Up Uncle Rich

This morning my Uncle Rich had pretty major back surgery, and although the doctors had to do more extensive work than originally thought, they are optimistic that the eventually outcome will be positive. We are keeping Uncle Rich in our thoughts and prayers for a good recovery!

Monday Ramblings

One of these days very soon, a post will appear with all shots of the back of Owen's head, half his face, a close up of a book, and a super close up of his finger; because lately that's what I seem to get when trying to take his picture! Owen is definitely on the move, all the time.

We too were on the move again this past weekend, traveling to PA for Uncle Rich and Aunt Cathy's party, where we got to visit with family and meet some blog fans. Owen enjoyed playing with my cousin's almost one year old son Cole; and Emily, a very stylish nine year old who already owns a Vera Bradley purse, happily posed with my VB diaper bag and entertained us all with her mind-reading abilities.

Today was our second post placement visit with our social worker Anne and I'm happy to report that Owen was his usual charming self and Anne commented several times on his positive attachment to us, amazing attention span, great motor skills, and happy disposition.

Tomorrow we have his 18 month check-up, which I'm sure will send me spiraling back into mommy crisis mode and will probably result in trying to teach him how to do cartwheels or say the Pledge of Allegiance. Yes, Bob thinks I'm crazy, but in my defense, I'm a Kaufmann ... and along with a fierce competitive streak, good hair, and a major sweet tooth, I inherited a supreme worry gene!

New Year - New Look!

I'm not sure I'm completely happy with it though, so don't be surprised to see some tweaks in the next few days.

One thing I am sure of ... how cute Owen looks in his new Navy sweatshirt, a Christmas present from Aunt Chris, Uncle Jeff, Andrew, Allison and Ben (Andrew is currently a midshipman at the US Naval Academy in Annapolis). Thanks guys!